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4 Sex Toy Shows: ANME, XBIZ, SHE and AVN

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For those of us in the adult toy industry, January kicks off the year as the crazy month, at least for those of us behind the counter. I’m dizzy with the FOUR shows within two weeks starting on Monday, that let me learn, share, buy, grow and my favorite, schmooze. ANME, XBIZ, SHE and AEE/AVN. Hold on to your seats and join me for this whirlwind schedule.
ANME, the Adult Novelty Manufacturers Expo, is the beginning of the series of shows on January 12 and 13. While January is considered the slower show of the two shows, the other being held in July), everyone always poses the question: “What’s new?” Ah yes, what’s new. I am sure I’ll be seeing plenty of new styles of pink rabbits, more BDSM related products because of the impending release of the hotly anticipated movie “Fifty Shades of Grey.” The printed version caused a frenzy in our industry two years ago and many of us are hoping that when people actually SEE the dominant and submissive action between the two characters, that they’re gonna run right out and buy lots and lots of equipment from us. Sportsheets is anticipating a newly minted audience rushing out to discreetly buy kits and have prepped themselves with their cleverly titled Sexperiments line, which is so new, we don’t even have them yet on the GrandOpening.com website! But check it soon! I’m sure there will be plenty more at the show and I can’t wait to see everything.
Right after ANME is the XBIZ360 show from January 13-16. It’s a really good, trade only networking and learning event that’s really good. It’s not so much booth oriented but allows plenty of time for schmoozing (my favorite!) and the learning is excellent. Even I learn a lot when I’m there (especially when I poke my head into the adult film and web masters parts of it).  It offers all the cousins in the smut family: adult film industry, the adult toy industry, the adult web industry, or in any aspect of the adult pleasure industry so it’s always fun to get together during this perverted kind of family gathering. My favorite!  XBIZ Industry Executive Awards with YOURS TRULY being nominated as Community Executive of the Year! Can’t wait for that and wish me luck! I’ve been in the biz for 22 years now and in LOTS of communities in this wacky industry I love so much. Stay tuned! I’ll let you know when I win!
And the XBIZ Awards on January 15 are gonna be so hot, it’s gonna scorch the Nokia Theatre in downtown LA! It’s gonna be great. My favorite new gizmo, Bubble Love, is nominated in a few categories so I’ll keep my fingers crossed we win!
The XBIZ 360 event runs into the SHE show which is the Sexual Health Expo, put on by XBIZ at the Sofitel Hotel in Beverly Hills on the weekend of January 17-18. It IS a consumer show and I’m sure there will be many hungry and savvy sex curious attendees wanting to attend every workshop offered. And yes, there are awards to be given out over the weekend for the top female sexual health products on the market today. Another award show, another dress, no problem!
Then it’s home for two days to catch my breath and do laundry and other shit around the house (do I buy groceries?!?) before I drive out to Vegas for the granddaddy of ’em all, the AVN show, aka the big ass porno convention that has been in existence for over 30 years. I’ve been going to it since about 1997 and it’s hard to believe it’s been that long. It’s pretty whack and it’s at the Hard Rock from January 21-24. It’s a crazy time keeping up with all the action there which covers the gamut but in a very different way from all the other shows, mixed with industry folks and a shitload of fans, which I love and drive me crazy at the same time.
And yes, there’s not one but TWO award shows during the event: the O Awards for the adult novelty products and the AVN Awards for all of the other parts of the industry (including – ADULT NOVELTIES!!). That’s two more dresses I need to get!
On Sunday, January 25, I am happy to announce that I’ll be recovering, from what, I don’t know. I’ll be driving back and will leave early enough to avid the stampede down the 15 back home to LA. Two weeks of shows that are back to back and front to front will keep me at a crazy pace and force me to drink far too many 5 Hour Energy Shots (my favorite ones being orange and grape).  I’ll have a lot to write about so as they say in Hollywood (or at least they USED to), “Stay tuned!”
Okay, I’m going to start a tradition which is one of my favorites. As you may know, I have been blogging on XBIZ for years (here’s the link) and I always write a Joke Of The Blog at the end of it, so why not here?
So here’s the first one… there will be a lot more…
Speaking of Vegas, one night a couple had angry sex. You know, the kind you get through because you want to spite your partner, and you get through it but when you’re finished, you know you’re done. After the woman had sex with her husband, she angrily pulled on her clothes, started packing her suitcase and barked “That’s it. I’m done. I’m moving to Las Vegas where I can get $300 for what I just did with you.” Her husband looked up at her and said “Ya think you can survive on $900 a year?”

FOUR Sex Toy Shows this month: ANME, XBIZ, SHE and AEE!

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For those of us in the adult toy industry, January kicks off the year as the crazy month, at least for those of us behind the counter. I’m dizzy with the FOUR shows within two weeks starting on Monday, that let me learn, share, buy, grow and my favorite, schmooze. ANME, XBIZ, SHE and AEE/AVN. Hold on to your seats and join me for this whirlwind schedule.
ANME, the Adult Novelty Manufacturers Expo, is the beginning of the series of shows on January 12 and 13. While January is considered the slower show of the two shows, the other being held in July), everyone always poses the question: “What’s new?”
Ah yes, what’s new. I am sure I’ll be seeing plenty of new styles of pink rabbits, more BDSM related products because of the impending release of the hotly anticipated movie “Fifty Shades of Grey.” The printed version caused a frenzy in our industry two years ago and many of us are hoping that when people actually SEE the dominant and submissive action between the two characters, that they’re gonna run right out and buy lots and lots of equipment from us. Sportsheets is anticipating a newly minted audience rushing out to discreetly buy kits and have prepped themselves with their cleverly titled Sexperiments line, which is so new, we don’t even have them yet on the GrandOpening.com website! But check it soon!
I’m sure there will be plenty more at the show and I can’t wait to see everything.
Right after ANME is the XBIZ360 show from January 13-16. It’s a really good, trade only networking and learning event that’s really good. It’s not so much booth oriented but allows plenty of time for schmoozing (my favorite!) and the learning is excellent. Even I learn a lot when I’m there (especially when I poke my head into the adult film and web masters parts of it).  It offers all the cousins in the smut family: adult film industry, the adult toy industry, the adult web industry, or in any aspect of the adult pleasure industry so it’s always fun to get together during this perverted kind of family gathering. My favorite!  XBIZ Industry Executive Awards with YOURS TRULY being nominated as Community Executive of the Year! Can’t wait for that and wish me luck! I’ve been in the biz for 22 years now and in LOTS of communities in this wacky industry I love so much. Stay tuned! I’ll let you know when I win!
And the XBIZ Awards on January 15 are gonna be so hot, it’s gonna scorch the Nokia Theatre in downtown LA! It’s gonna be great. My favorite new gizmo, Bubble Love, is nominated in a few categories so I’ll keep my fingers crossed we win!
The XBIZ 360 event runs into the SHE show which is the Sexual Health Expo, put on by XBIZ at the Sofitel Hotel in Beverly Hills on the weekend of January 17-18. It IS a consumer show and I’m sure there will be many hungry and savvy sex curious attendees wanting to attend every workshop offered. And yes, there are awards to be given out over the weekend for the top female sexual health products on the market today. Another award show, another dress, no problem!
Then it’s home for two days to catch my breath and do laundry and other shit around the house (do I buy groceries?!?) before I drive out to Vegas for the granddaddy of ’em all, the AVN show, aka the big ass porno convention that has been in existence for over 30 years. I’ve been going to it since about 1997 and it’s hard to believe it’s been that long. It’s pretty whack and it’s at the Hard Rock from January 21-24. It’s a crazy time keeping up with all the action there which covers the gamut but in a very different way from all the other shows, mixed with industry folks and a shitload of fans, which I love and drive me crazy at the same time. And yes, there’s not one but TWO award shows during the event: the O Awards for the adult novelty products and the AVN Awards for all of the other parts of the industry (including – ADULT NOVELTIES!!). That’s two more dresses I need to get!
On Sunday, January 25, I am happy to announce that I’ll be recovering, from what, I don’t know. I’ll be driving back and will leave early enough to avid the stampede down the 15 back home to LA. Two weeks of shows that are back to back and front to front will keep me at a crazy pace and force me to drink far too many 5 Hour Energy Shots (my favorite ones being orange and grape).  I’ll have a lot to write about so as they say in Hollywood (or at least they USED to), “Stay tuned!”
Okay, I’m going to start a tradition which is one of my favorites. As you may know, I have been blogging on XBIZ for years (here’s the link) and I always write a Joke Of The Blog at the end of it, so why not here? So here’s the first one… there will be a lot more…
Speaking of Vegas, one night a couple had angry sex. You know, the kind you get through because you want to spite your partner, and you get through it but when you’re finished, you know you’re done.
After the woman had sex with her husband, she angrily pulled on her clothes, started packing her suitcase and barked “That’s it. I’m done. I’m moving to Las Vegas where I can get $300 for what I just did with you.”
Her husband looked up at her and said “Ya think you can survive on $900 a year?”

All Rabbit vibrators are not created equal.

Rabbit Vibrators and Anatomy: Do You Know Where My Clit and G Spot Is?

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You know, after being in this business for over 18 years after founding Grand Opening! in 1993, I am always completely amazed by all of the gizmos and vibrators that are constantly being invented and released by companies around the world. Products to stick in any available orifice, stick on any available wet spot, slide onto any naughty bit that compels you to do so and believe me, nothing is considered sacred. Butt holes, snatches, mouths… what else is there? I haven’t seen anything to create an ear-gasm but I have a feeling it’s just a matter of time.
Because you’ve been a steady reader of my blog, you already know the different types of materials that toys are made of but that’s not my issue with this blog. My issue is this: how many manufacturers actually TEST the toys they sell? Learn how they work? How ANATOMICALLY CORRECT are they? Given my experience working for a major IMPORTER (see previous blog), I can confidently tell you that the answer is NO. They, as well as many other major manufacturer/importers, look at products to determine their sellability and that’s pretty much it.

Rabbit Vibrators

For this product testing blog, let’s focus on Rabbit vibrators…

All Rabbit vibrators are not created equal.

This is where the good stuff is.


Now, what is it with the damned RABBIT vibrators that reproduce like, well rabbits. How many do we REALLY need? Anyway, looking at the several hundred that are out there, there’s only a few that are actually anatomically correct. For example, I have worked with a foreign manufacturer who was stunned when I pointed out how close the interior G Spot is to the external clitoris and I am sure this is something he was aware of whenever he had sex with his wife. This manufacturer spoke very broken English but it didn’t take too much to have him understand my hand signals showing him the position of the inside G Spot and the outside clit, while his wife was furiously nodding her head and smiling at me as if I had unleashed the Holy Grail of Female Anatomy. The toys that he designed were of the same design and thinking of so many other toys… that women always want long shafted vibrators and we ALWAYS want one of those damn rabbits on them because we ALWAYS want clitoral stimulation on our long shafted vibrators. Well, not all of us do but that’s another blog.
Let’s play Mr. Science for a moment: if you want to really experience how far the clit is from the internal G Spot, here’s something you can do as you read this. Make a claw shape with your hand, basically making the letter C with your thumb at the bottom and your fingers at the top (you can fold all the other fingers other than your index fingers for a better effect). Now, bend the first knuckle of your thumb and this is the general distance between the outside clit which is represented by the tip of your thumb and the interior G Spot which is now at the tip of your index finger. Not that far from each other, eh? Now go look at any number of those rabbit vibrators and you’ll see what I mean about how far the rabbits are from the magic G Spot stimulating twirling pearls (whether in a fixed rotation or not) or whatever the titillating, twirling, ever-amazing internal stimulation shaft gizmo that the particular toy offers.
There’s just two rabbit vibrators that I have found that actually have it right. One is not even a rabbit but a dual stimulator that is the correct shape without having that cervix pounding, too long, “a guy must have invented this” shaft. It’s made by Blush Novelties and it’s the Beau Clit Stimulating Vibrator with Dual Motors that’s waterproof, too! Now, if every toy manufacturer could base it on this perfect G Spot/clit distance, I’m sure there’d be lots more rabbits sold and a lot of them used more comfortably.
The other is the Silicone Deluxe Rabbit Pearl by Pipedream Products, which is one of my favorite toys. Here’s why it’s so great: it’s a not-too-long silicone vibrator with a section of twirling pearls that you can’t see but trust me, they’re in there. It has a rabbit, that, get this, is COMPLETELY moveable so you can put it on the shaft exactly where the rabbit will tickle your willing clit while the spinnin’ pearls are gonna hit exactly where your G Spot is. Basically, it’s a custom made rabbit just for you! (assuming you’re a woman). But wait! There’s more! (I told you this was my favorite rabbit) The rabbit has a removable small bullet vibrators in its butt so you can have the bunny vibrate or use the small, vibrating bullet on its own, too. AND THERE’S MORE! The wide silicone ring that the rabbit is on stretches and is removable and becomes a comfortable cock ring that can be used by itself for a rabbit ring! And for those of you who like stimulating yourself mano a mano, you can loop the rabbit cock ring on your index and middle fingers, stimulate your clit with the vibrating rabbit ears and find your own damn G Spot. The only drawback is that it has a not strong enough two speed motor but this rabbit makes up for that in so many ways, including the button that reverses rotating direction.
Wow… thinking of hundreds of rabbit vibrators out there is making me horny. Product testing… it’s a dirty job but I really love doing it.
Okay, this is one of my favorites for JOTB… (joke of the blog)
An elderly Jewish man comes back from an appointment and says to his wife “Sophie, da doctah tells me I got VD. Go look it up in the dictionary… I didn’t wanna ask him what it was.” Sophie returns with a huge smile on her face: she’s beaming! She says “Hymie, Hymie! You have nothing to vurry about… it only affects the Gentiles!”

Sex Toy News & What's Up With the "Sold As a Novelty Only" Line?

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Hey Word Press readers! This blog was written during the two adult sex toy industry trade shows and this has info about them as well as FANTASTIC information about sex toys, aka “novelties.” This is a really good blog, if I do say so myself!
Well, what a crazy few weeks it’s been here in Grand Opening!’s Sex Toy World! As you know, there were two back-to-back shows (“Can’t we just all get along?”) and the usual gossip between the two shows, none of which I’ll go into here (or anywhere else for that matter). The two shows presented many different products: at ANE – anything from college team colored and packaged vibrators sold in a booth complete with a taligatin’ electric powered hot dog griller (Sporty Vibe) to an electric zapping, vibrating, inflatable, internal, and the “don’t forget we have to put a rabbit on it to sell” vibe (Cal Exotics) at ANME (aka “The Founders Show”). Parties were great at both places, attendance a little more at one than the other but I won’t tell you which had what. As for location, for the ANE show, it was a little odd to be selling vibrators and dildos, masturbators and nipple clamps a few steps away from twirling juvenile ice skaters at the Pasadena Skate Center and I found myself tiptoeing daily into the rink after the show just to balance the smut and purity brainwaves in my overloaded cranium. I think that worked.
Now I could write about all the new sex toy goodies available at the show but for those of you who aren’t that familiar with how these shows work, it’s basically that they are the big Kahuna shows of the entire year and all of the companies race to have their products at least SHOWN at them but not necessarily have them in stock and available when you saunter into their booths.
You know, it’s funny, because I refer to the companies at the show as Manufacturers (and it’s also included in the official name of The Founders Show, ANME – which is the Adult Novelty MANUFACTURERS Expo) but why is it that most of them say “Oh, we got our samples in from CHINA just in time for the show.” Now wouldn’t that make them more appropriately called the Adult Novelty IMPORTERS Show? That would then make them A-NIS and I guess no one wants to say that out loud in public, even in this business.
And why are they constantly being called Novelties?

On Novelties in the Sex Toy Biz

Well, to tell you the truth, here’s why (this is why I love to blog AND have ADD because I never know where my scribblings are going to go but I can tell ya that you’ll always learn something)…
While I am not sure of the EXACT time and place they were starting to be called “novelties,” I can sure guess (I’ll update this blog when I get a definitive answer).
Not sure if my wonderful readers have ever heard of this book, but there is a fascinating history of vibrators by the technology historian, Rachel Maines of Cornell University, who was kind enough to take the time and answer my inquiry about the history of the term “novelties” as it has to do with sex toys. The book is The Technology of Orgasm: “Hysteria,” the Vibrator and Women’s Sexual Satisfaction (Baltimore MD: Johns Hopkins University Press, 1998) and if you’re a sex toy geek like me, this book is already on your shelf. If not, get it and become the smartypants sex toy retailer you’ve always wanted to be.
Anyhoo, what she sent me is her deposition about vibrators that was used in Alabama’s case against my pal Sherri Williams, where Alabama said it was illegal to sell sex toys and went after Sherri and her store. The case, if you’re not aware, went all the way to the Supreme Court (yes, THAT Supreme Court) where the justices didn’t want to touch ANYTHING about sex toys and vibrators and threw it back to the state to decide. I’m not sure where it stands right now but that’s another blog.
So, you lucky readers, here’s the link to her 44 page deposition which is incredibly interesting to read: Rachel Maines vibrator deposition. Download it, print it out and put this on the break table at the store where you work. You’ll be amazed and thanks, Rachel, for your generosity.
Now back to your regularly scheduled blog….
I’d say they were called novelties in order to not call them vibrators and it was probably in the 50’s. Again, just guessing… but why are they continued to be called “novelties”? Aren’t novelties something you get at the end freezer case in the ice cream aisle in the supermarket? Aren’t novelties something you hand out at a 3 year old’s birthday party? Aren’t they something you get when you order a MickeyD’s Happy Meal? Hey! What a marketing idea for McDonald’s! An ADULT Happy Meal! Get a free novelty when you eat your Happy Meal consisting of something you probably can’t order at McDonald’s!
Okay, back to that pesky novelty issue. Here’s the answer you’ve been waiting for and another tidbit. Ya ready? Today they are called novelties in order to skirt FDA approval at the docks! Yep! FDA says if it’s a “novelty only” then it’s not meant for insertion and therefore doesn’t need to be tested for purity and contents. “Gee, they’re really NOVELTIES,” the importers can say. “We don’t need no schtinking FDA approval!” So that’s the reason why, in the teeny tiny little print on the bottom of the box and bottles, it reads “Sold As A Novelty Only.” I won’t even go into the veil many companies hide behind when it comes to quality… don’t get me started.
I will say, though, that one of my favorite companies, Vibratex, has NEVER sold a product that states its a novelty because they have always stood behind the quality of their Japanese made products. Yes, sometimes their shipments are held at customs but the tradeoff for quality is worth it for them. They also have the ol’ reliable Hitachi Magic Wand in their ranks, too, which has NEVER been an adult novelty, just created for those “hard-to-reach-places” like the middle of your gams.
And what’s up with another statement used on adult NOVELTY packaging? You know the one “Do not use on unexplained calf pain.” Okay, now that’s NOT about Uncle Billy’s heifer in distress on the farm… noooo…. ya ready for this one, too? Here goes: all those vibrator manufacturers don’t want you to use them on your calves in case you have an undiagnosed blood clot in your legs, in which case, a vibrator could dislodge it and it may wind up in your heart leading to a heart attack or up to your brain, leading to a stroke. Pretty cool, huh? About the vibrators, I mean… not the strokes.
Okay, so back to the shows. I’ll let you know when my favorite sex toy picks from the show become available to the market in the next few weeks and months, or, in other words, when my ship comes in loaded with sex toys from the major IMPORTERS. I’ll meet you at the dock…
And this JOTB (joke of the blog) is a good one:
Once this kid goes to the pharmacist to buy condoms for the first time. The pharmacist asks “How many do you want?” The kid nervously responds “Um, a dollar’s worth.” The pharmacist rings it up and states “That’s a dollar, ten.” The kid asks “What’s the ten cents for?” The pharmacist answers “It’s for the tax.” “Ooooh!” the kid says, “I wondered how you kept them on.”
This blog originally appeared on XBIZ.com

How To Buy A Vibrator – A Primer for Selling to the First Timer

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how to buy a vibrator

Oh dear.
Source: jackace


We’ve all had a first time… first time love, first time sex (“You NEVER forget the first person you have sex with” I always tell my virgin listeners and I am sure, right now, you are all flashing upon who that person was for you), and, for many of us, you remember getting your first sex toy or vibrator.
If you’re a retailer of these fabulous gizmos, you know you can be the person who changes lives forever for your customer by making the purchase of a first time toy a comfortable, memorable experience. I know this first hand. When I opened Grand Opening! in 1993, I didn’t realize that creating a comfortable space and my love and enthusiasm of vibrators and sex toys would have such an impact on my customers. To this day, I have customers come up to me and say “I bought my first vibrator from you and I’ll never forget the experience. Now I have lots of them!” Kinda like lovers, I think!

Selling a Vibrator, Step By Step

So how do you make that memorable experience in your own store? First, create a comfortable space that’s inviting for EVERYONE, men, women (okay, maybe not children), for all sexual orientations, etc. (that’s a whole ‘nother posting for a whole ‘nother time).
Let’s say your customer is a woman who is visiting an adult store for the first time (yes, there are plenty of women out there like this) looking to get her first vibrator or sextoy and has no clue what she’s looking for. Your customer approach should be friendly and supportive while guiding her to make her OWN choice. That’s important! How to go about this? Preface your questions like this: “I’m going to ask you a few questions that you don’t have to tell me your answers but just think about them… What kind of stimulation do you prefer? Inside? Outside? Either? Both? Not sure?” You’ll see her thinking and sometime she’ll share her information with you. Continue with “If it’s outside, then a clitoral vibe will be good, like these bullet vibrators. If it’s internal, then these types of vibrators would work such as the popular G Spot vibes or the more “traditionally shaped vibrators.” They can also be used externally if you’re not sure which kind to get OR if you like both internal and external stimulation ‘cuz you’ll never know what’s on the menu on different nights! Also, if you just want the sensation of feeling full, dildos are great for that. Something to keep in mind is that a vibrator can be a dildo by just not turning it on, but a dildo usually can’t be a vibrator, although there are many out there where you can take out the vibrator such as the Tantus line of silicone toys.” Sometimes, she won’t know what size to reference and I always mention “Think of a lover you’ve had and what size made you happy…” (Notice no gender preference there? No “what size was he?” type of thing because you never know what someone’s preference is when they walk into the door).
Now this is probably THE most important thing to mention when someone is choosing ANY toy. I always say THE most important factor when buying a toy is to tell your customer GET WHAT APPEALS TO YOU VISUALLY. It’s kind of like food: if you don’t like what the food looks like, you probably won’t want to eat it. Your friends might say “The Rabbit is my favorite toy” but if you’re thinking that it might be too big or the gizmo looks like it’s going to do too many things, then DON’T GET IT. It will only sit in a drawer and collect cat hair on it. By finding a toy that agrees with your eyes, it means that your body is agreeing to it too, since it will ultimately be your body using it. Your customer will be grateful for this information and guidance.
So use these tips in your brick and mortar store or if a friend asks you how to buy a vibrator or dildo. It works!
Okay, and on another front… in case you missed it, here’s some good info about the ongoing “battle” between LA County health officials and those of us in the adult industry. Here’s the full XBIZ report: The dirt…
And here’s the JOTB: A woman goes to the produce department in a grocery store and picks up a cucumber. The clerk comes up to her while she picks one out and says “Oh, those are 75¢ each and two for $1.00.” “Hmmm…” she says as she grabs a second, “I guess I could eat the other one.”
This blog originally appeared on my blog on XBIZ.com

Bombs Away With Bullet Vibes!

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Geesh! You know, I’m crackin’ with blogging about all different kinds o’ sex toys, drill down (or, is that, drill IN) with individual sex toys (product testing is the best part of this job!), and give ya lots of general info, too. So here’s another installment for ya with bullet vibes as the focus!
You already have the 411 about silicone dildos so how’s about dem bullets? Yeah, bullet vibes and eggs… A quick peek at my Grand Opening! website leads me to, WHAT??!? SEVEN HUNDRED AND THIRTY FIVE CHOICES!! Let’s see, that almost works out to one bullet for almost two years… what’s a girl to do?!

How to Pick the Right Bullet Vibes

Okay, let’s break this down to a couple of categories… how about small and wireless first. There’s one touch mini ones, big wireless ones, little wireless ones, remote control ones (okay, they usually have a small wire for the radio signals). These bullets are great to use clitorally (externally), or some of ’em can even get slipped into vagina land and they’ll make your pelvis vibrate better than one of those fake pussy masturbation jack packs for guys ‘cuz it’s the REAL THING! (Okay, so maybe the other difference is that you have to buy us dinner first). But you have to pop out the small wireless bullets if they’re inside, otherwise your upcoming sonogram is gonna look pretty weird. Learn how to squeeze ’em out which is the best way to do it.
Squeeze ’em out… oh yeah. Using that great sex muscle, aka PC muscle or, if you really wanna get technical, the pubococcygeus muscle, which connects the pubic bone to the coccyx bone (your tailbone) and is basically the pelvic “sling” that holds your guts up, otherwise aforementioned guts would pool around your ankles and make walking difficult, never mind breathing a little tricky. The PC muscle in gals can squeeze around anything inserted and squeeze out anything that needs it to. It comes in handy when you want to pop out wireless bullet vibes when the action has trickled out of your throbbing snatch.
BUT! No matter how good you think it might feel, you NEVER want to put a wireless bullet up your butt because it can easily slip into never-never land and just ask any emergency room tech about the latest x-ray they took. It’s only funny if it happens to someone else…
Okay, so let me pick a couple of my favorite bullet vibes for their quality and power: the simplest and easiest to use is the Screaming O, single speed one touch bullet that takes 3 LR44 watch batteries. Easy to travel with, easy to use. A little bigger (and not so much for insertion) and incredibly powerful, is the Ro-88 Chrome Bullet, a single speed beauty that is strong enough to satisfy those gals who insist that bullets aren’t strong enough.
But in all of my experience in selling bullets and vibrators to thousands of horny folks, Pipedream’s wireless remote vibe is the best for quality, value, and thrills. This wireless, slightly larger, remote controlled sucker works through METAL WALLS AND DOORS and up to about 100′ away. I’m not kidding. Put this one up your lovebox and let the fun begin. And it has 10 speeds so just hand over the control to someone else and go along for the ride. You won’t be disappointed and you’ll be hungry for more.
Speaking of horny… I have to get back to more product testing… poor me…
This blog originally appeared on my blog for XBIZ.com

So What's That Dildo Made Of? A Brief History of Silicone Toys

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Let’s look at the original kind of sex toys: dildos. History has it that jade and stone and probably wood and bone have been used as sextoys in the past (and probably still are. Maybe that’s where the term “boner” came from). Dildos were and probably still are the most easily accessible toys out there – pretty much anything with a cylindrical shape that can fill a woman’s vagina (or, for both sexes, a butthole) is a dildo. Hey, why do kids on the playground insult each other by calling their rivals “You dildo!”? If they only knew at their tender ages that dildos can make for some hot sex, they’d use a different insult… Some people call these “dongs” also but I think that’s an old school name for them so I’ll call ’em dildos… where did the name “dong” come from anyway?
Back to sex toys. Dildos had been made with all sorts of things then a rubber material called latex came along. Ah, latex. The material that was once part of every toy is now considered old school. It’s kind of expensive to use now and it’s sticky and stinky and messy to use so most companies are getting away from using it for their toys. And there’s that pesky latex allergy thing that so many health care practitioners are complaining of, probably due to over exposure to the stuff… glad I didn’t use too many BandAids as a kid. So not many companies are using it anymore for toys and that’s a good thing.

Silicone: The Dildo’s Best Friend

So what ARE they using? Briefly, there’s the top o’ the line silicone – a non-porous rubber that has no odor and costs a little more but is worth it. And here’s a little known factoid about the silicone dildo… wanna learn the history of how they became dildos to begin with? Sure
you do!
Once upon a time, there was this Jamaican man named Gosnell Duncan, who, due to an unfortunate accident, was unable to copulate with Mrs. Duncan (I’m keeping this story PG in case you want to read it to your kids at bedtime. Or your girlfriend). One night she said to her hubby, “Oh, Gosnell, honey, I wish you could make a dildo so you could fuck my brains out at night.” (Whoops, forgot about the kid’s bedtime story) “Oh, Gosnell, honey, I wish you could be the man that I married and make love to me like it was our wedding night again.”
So what did the enterprising Mr. Duncan do? After months of thinking about this with his other disabled men buddies, he thought of what kind of material was out there in the world that was durable, firm yet flexible, could retain body heat, was waterproof (I suppose Mrs. Duncan might have gotten a little wet in that department), could be made in many colors, and could easily be made without having to travel to Indonesia to get that raw, stinky, latex material. And guess what material that was? Silicone! As in SILICONE BATHTUB SEALANT! Yep, Mr. Duncan went straight to the source who originally formulated the stuff, a little known company called GE – known more for their light bulbs and bringing good things to light. The kind folks at GE started to work with Mr. Duncan with his odd but compassionate request for help and two years later, Mr. Duncan was fabricating real looking dildos out of skin toned silicone which all the men and their lucky wives enjoyed copiously.
So how did these puppies wind up in the hands and snatches of women around the world? Ah! Not an easy answer! Around 1975, Mr. Duncan was reading about a small, feminist sex toy shop in Manhattan (which is also credited with being the FIRST one in the country) called Eve’s Garden, founded and owned by Dell Williams. When he saw the ad, Mr. Duncan thought in his sing-songey Jamaican accent “Owh… I wonder if leeezbions would like dem?” and he got in touch with Ms. Williams and the rest, as they say, is HERSTORY.
And oh, about those other materials for sextoys? I’ll let you know about them in future blogs. I gotta go do some product testing. Now where’s my lube?
This blog originally appeared on my web blog on XBIZ.com